The Bastard Operator From Hell FAQ v1.6
This is the Bastard Operator From Hell (and other) FAQ file v1.6 (Revised
Beta) created in response to the sporadic queries I get regarding things
I write and post to Usenet News. You have received it because either:
A. You asked for it
B. It looks like you want some information from it
C. I know you're paying for every byte you receive
(which means you'll get the 2000 line version)
D. You're a postmaster and the person I sent it to passed a bad
return address to me.
E. Extra Terrestrial Activity.
Q0. Is there a book? Tell me there's a book?
A0. There's a book. Maybe.
A0b. Send email to email@example.com to hear more.
Q1. Can you mail me BOFH/Quantum Optics/Part 4 of xxx/Party Dude/etc?
Q2. Can you tell me where to get BOFH/etc?
A2. Possibly. It should be available on Anonymous FTP at the
following site. It may not be up to date at all tho:
cathouse.org in /misc/fun/humor/simon/
Also, my WWW archive is fairly complete. (See Below)
Q3. How many BOFHs were there?
A3. Well, it's a little grey for me, but to my knowledge there was:
2 pre-BOFH texts (Striped Irregular Bucket Series)
~15 BOFH real
2 Bastard System Manager from Hell
2 or 3 Bastard Operator from Britain
1 Last Bastard Operator from Hell
1 more Bastard returns briefly
1 more Bastard goes to the Trade Show.
(There's probably a discrepancy as I didn't keep a hot copy
the whole time so I may have missed one somewhere.
There were two "full" reposts to my knowledge:
"The Executive Relief Repost" and (prior to BOFB)
"The Penultimate REREPOST"
The Penultimate REREPOST (or REPOST) is the last compilation
available, so if you have that, you have a major part of it.
10-Jun-1995. 1 more "The Bastard's still about"
22-Dec-1995. 1 more "The Bastard does Xmas"
Q4. Will there be any more BOFHs?
A4. I've given up denying it, I have no idea. I do some for
"Network Week" (U.K) and Datamation (U.S) Magazines
from time to time.
Q5. Is any of it true?
A5. None of it. P.s. You have a lot of free disk now. Don't thank
me, it was my job.
Q6. Why did you do it?
A6. At first because I was bored.
Q7. Did you ever *really* do any of that stuff?
A7. Ah.... ... no.
Q8. Can I use the BOFH from your web site in my
A8. What the hell. The only things I ask are:
0. You acknowlege copyright
1. You acknowlege the author (me!)
2. You don't edit it in any way (If it sucks, don't use it)
3. If your magazine/newspaper/book is earning a truckload of
cash I'd like to see some of it!!! ;-}
4. If you're not getting a truckload of dosh, I'd still just
like to get a copy of your magazine, book, paper whatever,
just to know how it's travelling.
NOTE: The Electronic Rights of BOFH are owned by Datamation
Magazine or their publishers. I would prefer that people
who have electronic versions record this cos they've been
pretty good to me over the years.
Q8a. What's the copyright situation?
A8a. I retain all copyright on my stuff unless otherwise stated
Q9. You convinced me. Where can I send the truckload of cash?
A9. To me!: Simon Travaglia
P.O. Box 13018
Q10. What if I haven't got a truckload of cash?
A10. Join the club. I collect cameras... (Pentax K1000s by
preference). A dinky fridge magnet perhaps?
Q11. When did the last net-posted BOFH come out?
A11. December 1995
Q12. When did the first one come out?
A12. Dunno, I didn't pay attention at the time, I didn't think it'd
catch on. (I got some angry mail from people who didn't like it
and thought I denigrated the good name of Computer Support)
Q13. Have you written anything else?
A13. All sorts of stuff. It probably requires a well 'tuned' sense
of humour. cathouse.org (as mentioned above) has a directory
called 'simon' that has some of my stuff in it.
More of my stuff is on my web page (see below). Some other stuff
I neither have, nor in some cases remember writing. So it goes.
Q14. I'm a psych grad - what was BOFH's motivation?
A14. The undeniable realisation that Computer Operators rule the world!
Q15. Is that the lot then?
A15. Ah. Well, there's a WWW distribution at Waikato University
which contains the most complete collection I know of.
Q15a. So where's this network week site with all the new bofhs?
follow the Network Week links.
Say hello to Maxwell Cooter while you're at it.
Q15b. Ist das alles?
A15b. Ok, there's a webbed german language version on:
A15b(ii) Ok, there's also a Russian version (apparenly, I can't
read it) at:
A15b(iii) There's a latin version on:
Q16. Anything Else?
A16. I thought about getting "The Bound Bastard" or "The Bound
Bastard and Other Stories" printed or maybe a tee-shirt
with "Talk to me and I'll kill -9 you!" but I didn't know
how well it would go. But if anyone can track down a
publisher who had the wherewithall to do it...
Versions of Tee-Shirts were made by JFurr (lost his email
addr) way back, and Network week in 1996.
*Late Note* Both Network Week and Chuck Burke
are looking at compiling books as at 28-1-97
Q17. What, no "Sorry about all your files" or "What was your
A17. Oh, of course. What was your username and password again?
Q18. How many K1000's have you got?
A18. Two. Broken. And I paid for them too.
I haven't *EVER* received one. It would be nice. (Hint Hint)
But a mate (Dave Greenwood) sold me one once!
Today's network prescription courtesy of:
Uni of Waikato
Private Bag 3105
Fax: +64 7 838-4066
Ph: +64 7 838-4709
Converted to HTML by Andrzej Korcala
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